I wish you were still here to see all the things I am doing. I started playing guitar after you died. You would love what I am doing with my children’s music. I remember when you gave Kim the guitar. You never knew I would be the one who would learn to play. I’m working on my fourth CD for children now. You would be so proud. I miss you so much and I miss your love and support.
I asked you on your deathbed what you were thinking about and you said, “my family.” I know that you didn’t always get what it meant to be an involved father and you did a lot of things wrong, but I heard you as you knew and regretted those mistakes. You loved us all very much and I know if you could come back you would do so many things differently.
I personally always appreciated your love for me. I think I held a special place in your heart. I loved that you knew how to hug me even when mom wasn’t as good at doing that. You gave me your sense of love, empathy and affection and I thank you. You did teach me how to hit a softball. I do wish we had more times like that. I know you regretted not spending more time with your children. And I think that is just the advice you would give to any dad.
You had a special kind of wisdom that I still honor. And thank you for becoming a good husband to mom in the end, a great father to us and a wonderful grandfather to your grandkids. I wish I could hug you now.
We still have the rocking chair that you gave to Ben. Abby enjoyed it and I am saving it forever to remind me of you. We still have the little motorcycle that you gave Ben. Abby also loved it. I wish you knew Abby, and I wish she could see you. You would call her “Little Weasel,” and you would love her more than you have ever loved anyone. Oh, and she would love you so much. And as I write this letter I am glad that I have been reminded of this. I will remind her also.
Give mom a hug for me and I will see you on the other side.
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